This is such a good reminder. An editor once told me that if what I write didn't get a bad reaction from at least one person, then I wasn't making bold/strong enough choices. I've always kept that with me.
As someone who has an 8-part podcast coming out in a few weeks (the largest piece of work I've ever put out in the world) I REALLY needed to read these specific words today. Anxiety is stalking me and my reviews aren't even out yet. This essay actually helps me tip toward some editorial choices that were previously undecided, or unclear if worth fighting for, but now I know. Thank you, Maggie!
Maggie, thank you so much for sharing your wisdomI have been thinking a lot lately about this and I am saving this post to reread when I need it! I also always need to give myself time to recover from the initial pain of someone not liking my work, recovering people-pleaser that I am, before I am able to process. Thank you so much for sharing these thoughts and your inspiring poetry and memoir with all of us.
I needed this today! Two thoughts: This post reminds me of the time I had my first photography "show" in an SF cafe... I was proud of my work, until I dropped by the cafe anonymously & overheard Art Institute students dismissing my photos in a worldly above-it-all manner. At first my heart sank. But then I remembered a big show at their school, and how I had barely liked any of the photos. And I thought about how if I saw my photos in a cafe, I'd be impressed. And I truly realized you absolutely cannot worry about what anyone thinks except your artist inside. So hard sometimes!! BUT what being an artist is all about! Courage!
2nd thought: I sent a recording of a very vulnerable song to some friends yesterday, and haven't heard any response. Of course I start worrying that they hate it, etc. Luckily I remembered that it really doesn't matter what they think, as long as I love it.
Power to us who dare to create and share our creations!!!
Hi Maggie, this Sunday morning, you're earning one more fan of your book "You Can Make This Place Beautiful." I am new here; my first posting. I liked your book so much--the unique form of memoir, not necessarily in a chronological order; each piece reads like a prose poem. Content-wise, I felt deeply the author's sadness, pain, and renewed strength for life, and courage of sharing them. You made something uniquely yours. Taste differs. As you may say, just keep moving.
When I started preschool, I was devastated to learn that two girls in the class didn’t want to be friends with me. My Mom said “not everyone is going to like you.” I spent almost 50 years trying to change that. Finally I get that I’m not for everyone and it’s ok to disappoint people.
Your writing is not vanilla ice cream it’s a definite Rocky Road! I am sure it touches a nerve in those who are wanting to stay in the numbness or are teetering on seeing some deeply painful truth in their lives but can’t tolerate it being seen on a page in front of them. I for one am grateful for your voice. I want to push against the borders of my being. ❤️❤️
Another example I want to share: Many times, Ive submitted photos to contests, juried shows, etc, and have learned that a photo could be turned down 10 times, but then accepted and awarded a prize by a far more prestigious show. Its all SO relative! and subjective!!
Yes! I sent out my second book manuscript for four years before Kimiko Hahn selected it as the winner of a book prize. You just never know. Patience & tenacity!
Thank you for sharing that. I’ve been sending out my first manuscript for a year and a half and all the almosts (honorable mentions, finalist nods) are wrecking me a bit from moving forward into making new work. I had this impression that all the books I love must get picked up quickly because they’re just so good.
I loved the form of the book! It's the way I write, so I guess it says something about me too. Maybe dislikes are the same? I've come to this place with age (and counseling) where I know my judgements, my feelings, my reactions are more about me than about the other person they are aimed towards. Not that people aren't wrong but the strength of my reaction is ALL me! So the flip side could be that when people react to our work it's easier to think of it as them expressing their "taste" and when you put it in food terms I get that.
Yes, we can't be everyone's cup of anything. There was a time when I would be devastated by this but happily, getting older and wiser-ish,, allows me to move on.
This is such a good reminder. An editor once told me that if what I write didn't get a bad reaction from at least one person, then I wasn't making bold/strong enough choices. I've always kept that with me.
Yes!
Reminded me of Nebraska's tag line: Nebraska, honestly, it's not for everyone.
As someone who has an 8-part podcast coming out in a few weeks (the largest piece of work I've ever put out in the world) I REALLY needed to read these specific words today. Anxiety is stalking me and my reviews aren't even out yet. This essay actually helps me tip toward some editorial choices that were previously undecided, or unclear if worth fighting for, but now I know. Thank you, Maggie!
I love this. Good luck with the podcast!
Maggie, thank you so much for sharing your wisdomI have been thinking a lot lately about this and I am saving this post to reread when I need it! I also always need to give myself time to recover from the initial pain of someone not liking my work, recovering people-pleaser that I am, before I am able to process. Thank you so much for sharing these thoughts and your inspiring poetry and memoir with all of us.
Yes! Needing to be "liked" gets in the way of making (or at least sharing) art.
I needed this today! Two thoughts: This post reminds me of the time I had my first photography "show" in an SF cafe... I was proud of my work, until I dropped by the cafe anonymously & overheard Art Institute students dismissing my photos in a worldly above-it-all manner. At first my heart sank. But then I remembered a big show at their school, and how I had barely liked any of the photos. And I thought about how if I saw my photos in a cafe, I'd be impressed. And I truly realized you absolutely cannot worry about what anyone thinks except your artist inside. So hard sometimes!! BUT what being an artist is all about! Courage!
2nd thought: I sent a recording of a very vulnerable song to some friends yesterday, and haven't heard any response. Of course I start worrying that they hate it, etc. Luckily I remembered that it really doesn't matter what they think, as long as I love it.
Power to us who dare to create and share our creations!!!
Hear, hear! 💗
“Tastes like the smell of a wet basement” 😂
🤷♀️😂
Hi Maggie, this Sunday morning, you're earning one more fan of your book "You Can Make This Place Beautiful." I am new here; my first posting. I liked your book so much--the unique form of memoir, not necessarily in a chronological order; each piece reads like a prose poem. Content-wise, I felt deeply the author's sadness, pain, and renewed strength for life, and courage of sharing them. You made something uniquely yours. Taste differs. As you may say, just keep moving.
Thank you 💗🙏
You’re not for everyone is so true!!
I’m pretty new here but look forward to engaging with you and friends! Thank you!
Glad you're here, Kyomi!
Thank you Maggie!! Love!
When I started preschool, I was devastated to learn that two girls in the class didn’t want to be friends with me. My Mom said “not everyone is going to like you.” I spent almost 50 years trying to change that. Finally I get that I’m not for everyone and it’s ok to disappoint people.
Your writing is not vanilla ice cream it’s a definite Rocky Road! I am sure it touches a nerve in those who are wanting to stay in the numbness or are teetering on seeing some deeply painful truth in their lives but can’t tolerate it being seen on a page in front of them. I for one am grateful for your voice. I want to push against the borders of my being. ❤️❤️
Another example I want to share: Many times, Ive submitted photos to contests, juried shows, etc, and have learned that a photo could be turned down 10 times, but then accepted and awarded a prize by a far more prestigious show. Its all SO relative! and subjective!!
Yes! I sent out my second book manuscript for four years before Kimiko Hahn selected it as the winner of a book prize. You just never know. Patience & tenacity!
Thank you for sharing that. I’ve been sending out my first manuscript for a year and a half and all the almosts (honorable mentions, finalist nods) are wrecking me a bit from moving forward into making new work. I had this impression that all the books I love must get picked up quickly because they’re just so good.
💪🏾🩷📝
I loved the form of the book! It's the way I write, so I guess it says something about me too. Maybe dislikes are the same? I've come to this place with age (and counseling) where I know my judgements, my feelings, my reactions are more about me than about the other person they are aimed towards. Not that people aren't wrong but the strength of my reaction is ALL me! So the flip side could be that when people react to our work it's easier to think of it as them expressing their "taste" and when you put it in food terms I get that.
Yes--learning not to take “yuck” personally (or feel overly invested in “yums” either)!
Yes, we can't be everyone's cup of anything. There was a time when I would be devastated by this but happily, getting older and wiser-ish,, allows me to move on.
Truth. And thank you for the reminder.💚
Thanks for the new office post-it in my sightline: “Create for you first.”
i'm a lifelong lover of both Eva Hesse and Sol LeWitt but I've never seen this letter so THANK YOU and...mayo on fries forever!!